Episode #1: Confessional

[joe]

So, I told Kirin that I would do a video confessional...............











































































But fuck that. That's not happening. I hate video confessionals.

Hi y'all! Great to be back, though seriously, what the hell did I get myself into?! I already feel paranoid and I haven't been in the game for 24 hours! These people seem so crazy. I'll get to my cast assessment in a bit, though. I guess I'll just shoot the shit for a bit.

First, I am probably never going to win MVP, so, I'm not going to be too concerned with that. I don't play these to impress the Alumni, as much as I may love them. I don't think anyone should play to impress the Alumni. It's sort of short-sighted and distracts you from actually playing well. So, yeah, not too concerned about MVP... yet.

Second, this is my first game since Bali! So it kinda feels weird. It's like I just went on a break. Is this my full-time job? When Tucker originally approached me about it, I was kind of... well, skeptical. For a few reasons. I assume that my appearance here pretty much means I'm out of the question for All-Stars 3, to start off. Not to mention, my win is SO recent... it really won't be hard for people to figure anything out about me. I did get a lot of praise as a good, albeit boring, player. Speaking of which...

I both love and hate my introduction. I love all those awesome things being said about me, naturally. Those are pretty spectacular. I don't often get praise, so, I appreciate it. Really. But... it also paints me as a huge target. Especially when you put mine up to Jermaine's, where his can basically be summed up as: "Jermaine is a cheater and any moron could have won Canada." When you put the two of us up against one another, it makes me sound like the bigger threat. I don't really know how to handle it. I'm mostly just playing it like I don't care what happens, as long as I'm not first out (which, granted, could give people incentive to vote me out first). And I mean, to be fair, I REALLY don't want to be first out. I've never been voted out first. I don't want it to start now. Sadly, this means my initial strategy is to be friendly, but mainly to win the first challenge. Oh, and on that note...

Here is what I suspect is going on! We're obviously not going to remain in this huge clusterfuck tribe forever. What I anticipate happening is that the first seven people who finish the speed-based challenge will end up on Brahmin, and the rest end up on the other two tribes. I assume there is going to be some kind of... hierarchical thing going on. I don't know if the other two tribes suffer by comparison or just one tribe suffers or what. I also don't know if these tribes will stay together, or if it's a constant shift. Oh my God, constant individual challenges. I think I could do it, especially against some of these newer players. Can I pull off an immunity streak to the end? Ha. We'll see, I guess. I can't rely on that forever, of course. Gotta work on that social game! I think, honestly, that is what will carry me through the most. If I just remain social and kind of... hide, a bit.

So, let's talk about this cast, shall we? I'll start off by saying thank you for not casting Cody like y'all originally intended! That would have been absolute torture. I don't care about Mike, though.

Aaron - Okay, so, some of you know, but, I know Aaron from before this game. The first game I ever won was hosted by him: Survivor Calamities 6: The Magic Kingdom. In short, Aaron said in the viewer's lounge that if I won the game, he would quit hosting forever. So yeah. Aaron and I do get along, but he doesn't hold me in very high regard as far as being a strong player goes. He definitely does not think I deserve to win, and in some instances, he's been relatively vocal about me being low on his list of people he likes. Other than that, our relationship is fine. We've spoken a few times so far. He and I share similar worries. We both are concerned that some of these people are friends who applied together. They seem too friendly. He is paranoid, I am paranoid. I think there is sort of an unspoken working relationship right now, kind of like what I had with Bill. But I don't think Aaron would go out on a limb to save me. Furthermore, he is not someone I would like to see touch the F2.

Animal - I haven't had a chance to speak with him one-on-one yet. But from the group chat, he seems like he could be a pretty chill guy. I will probably look for people like him to forge a relationship with.

B.K. - So I've had my eye on this kid before the game even started. He was constantly posting in the application thread. He's ridiculous. Way too damn jazzed, and he's clearly pretty damn green in the ORG world. I knew right away he'd be the person throwing deals around to every single person and their mother, which Fei has confirmed, and I also knew that he'd be the one that would likely first think he could scapegoat the returning players, which Fei has also confirmed. I haven't had a chance to speak with him yet. I don't think we'll mess well. I've played with people with whom there was a large age gap, but, it normally goes in the other direction.

Brenda - She is one of the only other Canadians in this game. I don't know if we'll bond over that, per se, but she seems sweet. She sorta reminds me of Natalia for some reason. I don't know why. We chatted a little bit here and there. We both like Final Fantasy, so, hopefully we can bond over that. I would like to think she's just sweet and naive, but that sorta bit me in the ass with Heeral.

Brookie - This bitch cray. I don't really know what to think of her. All I could think was "hot mess" when she was talking in the group chat. She just randomly whispered "vagina" out of nowhere. She might be too OTT for me to get along with her.

Fei - Oh my God, I love Fei. I can't help but love Fei. She's great. We get along really well. People love her. But she usually is the author of her own demise in these games. We've tried to work together all the time but it rarely ever works. That being said, she was my first alliance. Almost immediately. We pretty much solidified it right off the bat. She told me all the information about Brian. She's telling me other things. It's nice to have her, because she can relay info to me that others may not. Plus, she's good friends with Greg, and I assume she and Aaron get along. She can help things go in my favour.

Greg - Greg is such a sweetheart. And, fun fact, Greg and I have met in person! I don't know what he thinks of me, to be honest. I've publicly criticized his boyfriend, Bill. And I know that I generally am not that admired by his group of friends. I don't think he has any serious qualms about me. He probably won't worry about me too much, unless Bill has suggested he should worry. He's great to chat with. It's nice to have a familiar face. But I don't know that we'll work together. But, wouldn't that be kind of funny?

Honey - Oh my God. Mess. Mess. Mess. And I love it. And so will the Alumni. This woman is going to win MVP. I haven't had a chance to speak with her one-on-one yet, but she was pretty funny. To Zack: "What do YOU know about Nicki Minaj?" But yeah. That being said, I would like her gone sooner rather than later. People will cling to her because she's such a caricature of a human being. So, that's not good.

Jedda - I wanna like him because he's Australian, but he smokes (lol)... and honestly, I am wary of cute guys like him in ORGs because they can get what they want to an extent. Call it jealousy. Call it what you want. But facts are facts. I don't think we'll be able to bond.

Jeffy - I've spoken with him a bit. Seems like a funny guy. I get the impression that he's very smart. I think he'll be someone to look out for.

Jermaine - I love this dirty filthy hooker. Heh. Jermaine is my auto-alliance. We did verbally express it to one another, of course. But I can trust him pretty implicitly. I'm glad he's in this. Jermaine doesn't really try TOO hard, in my experience. He kinda just lays back and lets things happen, and it works for him. I think he's a bit worried about where he stands because of his winner status as well. I would like him to stick around for a while. I don't think anyone is too aware of our friendship, so, that's a good thing. I will relay all information to him.

Jordan - Jordan! Such a great guy. He definitely deserves a second chance, so good job bringing him back, y'all! I don't know where he and I stand with one another. I did spend a LOT of time talking about how he is so obviously gay in my Bali confessional. Haha. Hopefully he doesn't take that too negatively. But yeah. I don't know if he'll be able to commit too much to this game. I think he'll be able to immerse himself really well, though. I would like to work with him.

Lexi - Of the new people, she is by far one of my favourites. I dunno, there was sort of a natural ease with the conversation she and I had. We bonded over hating certain student archetypes in university classes. I think she and I can get along really awesomely. We'll see how it goes.

Nax - I don't know where "Nax" is from. I'll probably call him David from hereon out. He's a nice guy. I don't know why he has time to commit to this game, but whatever. He basically spent today reassuring me that I won't automatically be screwed for being a returnee. So, that was nice. Or maybe he's just trying to dissuade me from making any efforts. I dunno. Not sure how he'll fit in. Definitely seems like a smart guy.

Nicole - I have no opinion on her one way or the other. She seems... pretty? She's wallpaper right now.

Quanz - So we had an iS Live interview, and when they asked us who we should look out for strategically, Quanz said Jermaine and I. I don't know if that was a joke or not. I originally thought it was. But in the end it didn't feel like one. Heh. I don't know much about him other than that he's young. I think we can get along, though.

Ricky - This guy is a MESS. I get really weird vibes from him. He says he recognizes me from years ago, but I don't recognize him at all. I don't think we've played together. Anyway, he seems like the type to offer n00ds to win or get votes or something. If he wants to send them to me, great, do it up. It won't sway my choices in any way whatsoever, though. I would like him gone sooner rather than later.

Tabatha - Fodder.

Woods - This dude is going to stick out. I don't think he fits in anywhere? We chatted a bit, though. Seems cool. He's a very old school ORGer.

Zack - Of the new guys, he's probably my favourite. We actually like... had a legit conversation. Talked about career paths. Nice guy. Kinda cute, in a nerdy way. I was also surprised to find out he was gay. Um, at least I assumed so based off the skype chat earlier. Maybe I'm making assumptions again? Anyway, I could see myself working with him.

So yeah. That's what I think of this cast. Where did you find this group of crazy fucks? Why did you do this to me? WHYYYY?

[joe]

So I guess a minor update since I feel like I've been sort of neglectful of this confessional this first episode.

Jermaine told me today that Fei wants a three-way (holler) alliance with us. He then told me that she told him that she and David (Nax) are trying to set up a super alliance to make sure people's bases are covered should they end up on the two shittier tribes. This includes several people: David, Fei, Jermaine, Nicole, Ricky... to name a few? I think there were a few other names, but I can't remember. My name wasn't brought up because Fei wasn't sure what David thinks of me. I'd like to be included, I guess, but if all else fails, I don't mind throwing it under the bus. Personally I don't really care for that alliance since all those bitches can branch out, and that's too many people for one alliance. So, whatever. I guess as long as it isn't me, I'll be happy... for now.

Also, I had a pretty interesting conversation with Woods (Woodz?) earlier. He's an old school ORGer, which I like, and he seems to be pretty level headed. I think he's kind of a bit too "old" (in a sense) for this crew... even for Nax, who is clinging to his youth desperately through an alcohol dependency. Or something. We had a LOT in common... like not favourite TV shows. But personal stuff. I'll post that convo eventually. I think that's pretty much an agreed upon working relationship at this point.

All in all, I don't THINK I'm on anyone's mind as a target. I do think Brian is making himself out to be a big enough target on his own. But at the same time, I don't think Brian being a tard is enough to get him voted out. Especially based off this current system. The game essentially rewards the strong. Why vote out someone like Brian who poses no threat whatsoever?

I mentioned it to Jermaine earlier, but if I had my pick of who went first, it would be Brookie. She seems... odd. I think she is intentionally dumbing herself down. Plus she is such a fag hag it's ridiculous. I think that she could cling to people like Jedda and Ricky super easily, and I don't want that happening. Not to mention, apparently she said in the group chat last night that she'd never marry a black guy. Apparently I am playing with Jemima from BBUK. I have yet to have an actual conversation with her, so, yeah. The sooner she goes, the better.

And that is all for now.

[joe]

Oh, I also wanted to added that Nicole is a total sweetheart.

[joe]

I just wanna preface this oncoming confessional with the fact that is going to be using a word that has proven controversial in the recent past on this board. Alright? You've been warned! That being said...

Brookie is a cunt and I hate her and I hope she gets voted out this round.

There's just something very off-putting about the way she talks to people. Especially in that group chat. I've yet to have an actual one-on-one conversation with her, but after the things I've seen her say, I have hardly any interest in doing so.

I hear, as well, that the current plan is to vote her ass off on Vaishya. Thank fuck. Jermaine says that he is in the majority, with three people voting for Brookie. However, Jeffy is apparently very suspicious of Jermaine and, I guess, would like him gone. If any information gets to Brookie, then she is spared and Jeff goes. Otherwise, Brookie is gone. Naturally, I would prefer her to go over Jeffy, although really, either can go. I am surprised that Ricky would vote with them, but, who knows. It will show what kind of player he is if he doesn't. He told me in conversation tonight that he doesn't want to vote out Jermaine.

I feel very "out of the loop" in this game. It's unfortunate. I don't think people really wanna share anything with me. I also am very reluctant to approach people with game-related information. I want to feel proactive, but at the same time, I don't feel like I can. I'm probably pretty visible right now, being a returning player and all. I did tell myself that in this situation, I would have to lay low and just let others take one another out, but some shit needs to happen. Fortunately, winning immunity and having no connection to the first vote, I might be in a good spot. Other people are about to get blood on their hands, and for that I am thankful.

I guess I'll just sit back and take it easy and observe for now... there isn't too much that can be done on my part other than make social connections. It's hard to overcome pre-game relationships, though.

[joe]

Had a pretty good conversation with Ricky.

Turns out, talking about emotional baggage really makes people trust you. Now... do I do this with everyone?

But in all seriousness, I think I did judge him a little too harshly at first. It's a bad side of me. I just see that he's young and attractive and sociable and think that he's some messy bitch twink, but, I neglect to realize there could be any depth there. Maybe some kind of jealousy of wishing I could be attractive and sociable? I dunno. Who cares. This isn't Dr. Phil. The point being, it was a nice chat, and I think the more I have these chats with him, the more likely he is to wanna open up to the idea of working with me. Still plenty of time to formulate alliances.

Oh, by the way, regarding the alliance of me, Aaron, Greg, and Fei, I am calling it Chronically Offensive, so as to reference our Chronicles/Offensive relations. I kinda love it. I still need a way to make a "Friendzies to the Endzies 2.0" though... preferably one that doesn't contain the third member constantly trying to vote for the other member every opportunity she (or he...) gets.

[Sandy]

You don't have to be attractive or sociable! You won the million bucks already boo boo!

[joe]

THANKS... I think. >_> Lol.

[Deleted]

Backhand meet compliment.

YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL NO MATTER WHAT THEY SAY! WORDS CAN'T BRING YOU DOWN!